Why do we Marry Sir? This question was asked by a boy in my office in an online chat. )I have this habit of chatting with people of all ages)
Someone asked me this question in a message and without thinking this is the reply that came out of me. Once it came out I realised this is something I must share with others as my subconscious answer seems to point towards a deeper introspection of our age old beliefs about Family and it being the unit of society and also the new concepts of border-less world extending to an even newer concept of border-less families or one Family One World.
Bachelor Boy: Y WE GT MARRIED?
Old Me: A very bad question!!
Bachelor Boy: A SILLY QUESTION ,,,
Old Me: We get married because we are fools…
Bachelor Boy: I KNOW…BUT …I DONT FIND ANY REASON…HEHEHHE SIR…AAP VI…
Old Me: The reason is everybody marries so we marry too that is the answer
Bachelor Boy:IS IT REALLLY,,,?
Old Me If nobody married would anyone have married? yes think think step by step….
Bachelor Boy: HMMM THATS RIGHT…
Old Me: What i am asking is that if ALL around u were NOT interested in marrying and were NOT married u too wld have not married, right?
Bachelor Boy: HMMM,,,
Old Me: Only peer pressure and society pressure makes you marry because u think u r being left out and u actually get left outsince you will be aloneand everyone will have someone. But say nobody married, then what would be the situation ??
Bachelor Boy: HMMMM,,,
Old Me: Then everybody wld have everybody, anybody, whenever reqd as per choice. Why so?
Bachelor Boy: HMMM,,,
Old Me Because then nobody wld have anybody for his or her own to be busy with him or her only and wld be free for anybody, to have, any time. When nobody belongs to anybody, then everybody belongs to everybody. At the time of need everybody goes to everybody’s help. but POSSESSIVENESS should not be there. The MOMENT one wants to POSSESS, Bang! The “FREE” words gets lost. Got me ?
Bachelor Boy: GOT IT…SAMJHA,,…SIR ,,, DO U REALLY THINK ,,,MARRIAGE IS REQUIRED 4 A HAPPY LIFE…OR …THERE IS ALTERNATE WY
Nah .. marriage is reqd only to kill loneliness.. that is why I said if nobody married u need not marry also. Loneliness or requirement for companionship is the prime reason why people marry. Giving birth to child or extending your lineage through your progeny are all secondary requirements that have come up only because we think in terms of family and lineage. If we never had the concept of families never would have the concept of lineage come into existence. Because MAN /WOMAN like to Possess the concept of Calling someone one’s own came into existence and hence rest followed- marriage, childbirth, family, lineage. But core reason that started this all was NEED for Companionship. And this is the core reason why people marry. This need for companionship or having someone near to take care of us is more important in old age – our last stages of life.. but of course it affects life always at all stages- throughout in varying degrees.
If all are married then you living alone cannot expect company from married people. But if all were alone then all could be friends to each other, close to each other, come to the need of each other whenever required, hang out, even have sex, even cuddle or just love and yet NEVER POSSESS and ALWAYS be FREE. Do we not see this happening in old age homes or small societies where people help each other or old people? Why? Because there the sense of Possession or FEAR OF LOSING anything is missing. Old age homes are when Lives are ending and no longer possession has any meaning when one foot is into Grave. And in small societies you see people keeping doors open and nobody steals because everybody knows everybody and everybody is friend to each other.
IMAGINE a WORLD where all were free. Nobody would belong to anybody and Everybody would be available for All. There will an unending supply of friends and help and companionship at all times.
Everybody lives alone but it is a big family – one family.
One Family One world. Border-less World with Border-less Family.
One World- One family. With side benefits like nobody eyeing other’s property of any kind because everyone is single and so everybody would have common interest.
But then will this ever happen? It can happen ONLY If Brain Surgeons forcefully cut out that part of the brains from all humans that create POSSESSIVENESS. I wonder now how marriage came linked to World Peace.. Someone Please nominate me for peace Nobel Prize